Being Nonbinary Has Nothing To Do With Looking Nonbinary
It’s time to get rid of stereotypes about nonbinary people
UPDATE 2023: I wrote all these essays back when I was immersed in trans ideology. I detransitioned and I’ve changed my mind about many things. https://youtube.com/@RayAlexWilliams?si=JIEdBcopAIxOPtEW
I’ve been on hormones for almost four years. My presentation is femme. I use she/her pronouns. But I consider myself nonbinary, neither a man or a woman.
Often there is this stereotype that nonbinary people must strive for perfect androgyny. But that stereotype is harmful and overlooks the broad diversity among nonbinary people. Just like AFAB nonbinary people don’t have to disavow a feminine appearance, neither do AMAB nonbinary people. Vice versa for masculine or androgynous looks.
When we create and enforce these stereotypes in the trans community, we risk playing gatekeeper on who is trans or not. But just like there is no “right” way for men or women to present themselves, there is not a “right” way for nonbinary people to present themselves.
There is a similar stereotype that all nonbinary people prefer “they” pronouns. But pronoun usage does not define whether someone is “really” nonbinary. There is no logical entailment between what pronouns you prefer and whether you’re nonbinary.
